“ONE REASON A DOG IS SUCH A LOVABLE CREATURE IS HIS TAIL WAGS INSTEAD OF HIS TONGUE” – author unknown
I have always loved quotations. In fact I have many books on the subject. Every time that I see a clever one, I save it and find myself reading it many times over. Well this morning I was reading quotations about dogs. I’ve decided that I will try to write articles around some of those quotations in the future.
Someone recently asked me to write an article about losing friendships over dogs. I gave some thought to this. I put the idea on a “shelf” for awhile and after reading the above quotation, I thought maybe I could try to write something about it now.
When competition presents itself in our life, it can be a good thing. It’s the way sport teams win their games, it’s what makes children want to be the best at whatever they do and it’s what challenges us to better ourselves. However, competition can also bring out the ugly side of people as well.
In the sport of showing dogs competition is a good thing for the most part. It makes the breeder/exhibitor want to bring out his best animal for people to “drool” over and for the judge to honor his dog with the winning points. For the most part, people will show good sportsmanship to their fellow exhibitors. Then there are others that will rant and rave when things don’t go his way and make everyone uncomfortable in his presence.
Whatever it is that you’re involved with because of the ownership of the German Shepherd Dog (showing, breeding, training, rescue, etc.) this brings you in contact with other people that share a similar interest. Bringing people together sharing common interests and goals can be a good thing. It can also bring out the worse in some people, especially those that are highly competitive to begin with. It’s human nature to want to have the best and make other people take notice. My dog’s prettier than your dog. My dog is smarter than your dog, etc. This can open up the door for healthy exchange and some good natured joking around, but it also can lead to those that are not necessarily of the good nature type becoming aggressive and abusive.
What about those that have been our friend for years? You know the ones that I’m talking about. They’re our best buddies. We talk everyday on the telephone with them. We go shopping together. We go out to lunch with them. They’re at all our parties sipping our wine and eating our “famous” barbecued beans. Why heck, even our kids grew up together. We’ve both always owned dogs. But one day, we both own the same dog! We decide to co-own the newest little “superstar” in our kennel. Oh we don’t mind letting her go. She’s going to a good home. We don’t even bother to make out a contract. Our verbal contract is all we need with our best friend, isn’t it? WRONG!
In this authors opinion, I don’t care how well we know someone or for how long. Get EVERYTHING in writing, best friend or not. Best friends can become our worse headache, heartache or nightmare! I guess it’s because we expect more from those people that we love the most and hold dear to our hearts. We feel we can trust them. They would never think of doing something against us. I’m sorry to say, that these are the very people that can sometimes do us the most damage. It’s because of their closeness to us that we would never suspect them of any wrong doing. We might suspect the “trouble makers” of the breed, but never our closest friend.
Again in this writer’s opinion, I believe that these “so called best friends” have other agendas going on that has nothing whatsoever to do with dogs. When a person that is the closest to us turns on us, I believe it was never about the dogs to begin with. I believe that this person is jealous of us, perhaps for our success, perhaps for our lifestyle, perhaps for our intelligence, or whatever! It was never about the dogs to begin with. I believe it was about them and their view of our success or another positive aspect in our life that they felt threatened by. We have something that they want and maybe they will never be able to achieve. So blaming the loss of friendship over dogs doesn’t ring true for me. The “Green eyed monster” (jealousy) is one of the most destructive emotions that man can have. Heck even our dogs are jealous creatures. Just look at how they act when we show attention to another dog. Some have been jealous of other people that are close to us in our life even going as far as preventing those people that they view as a “threat” from sitting on “his” sofa!
If you’ve been in this breed or any breed for that matter for any length of time, you will notice one thing…….dog people love to talk about dogs! And when talking about a dog that leads to talking about those that own those dogs that you’re talking about. I mean there are some of the biggest gossips on the planet when it comes to discussions of dogs and “their” people. Like anything in the world of gossip, from the time it leaves the lips of the first person that shares a little “juicy tidbit” with someone until it erupts into the worst possible offense it can change the course of some people’s relationships forever!
So our feelings can be hurt, our friendships can be lost and our dreams can be shattered when we realize the one who we cared for the most didn’t feel the same way. I wonder if it really is worth it all in the whole scheme of things. The older I get, the more I realize that I’ll be “stepping up to the plate” sooner than later. Blaming the loss of friendship over dogs is foolish. It goes deeper than that but maybe it took owning dogs to find that out!
Oh the stories we pass on, oh the lies that we tell……”Oh what a tangled web we weave, when first we practice to deceive.”
From the book: "THE FRIENDSHIP FACTOR: HOW TO GET CLOSER TO THE PEOPLE YOU CARE FOR....A must read to strengthen friendships, timeless classic, a manual for living, warms the heart and helps you remember what's really important in life!
My rating: friendships are important: (4), healthy competition when showing dogs: (4)